A Pound of Flesh for Refinance

It was a couple of years since I had bought my house. The interest rates had dipped since I had taken the Mortgage. This was a perfect time to utilize refinancing options. Luckily, one my close friends is a lender. I discussed my options with her and agreed upon a refinance plan. She said she will send a list of documents that are required for the process in an email. She warned me that the list would be quite an extensive one. A day later, she sent me a professional email including her colleagues with the following list.

Hello XYZ,
As per our discussion, the following are required for Home Loan Refinance

  1. Last 2 Pay Stubs
  2. Tax Returns for current year
  3. W2s for last 2 years
  4. Homeowners Insurance
  5. Title Insurance
  6. Current mortgage statements
  7. Home equity loans
  8. Credit card Statements
  9. Auto loans
  10. Student loans
  11. Checking Account Statements
  12. Savings accounts Statements
  13. Stocks and Bonds
  14. Mutual funds and CDs
  15. 401K statement for past 2 years
  16. A Pound Flesh
  17. Your First Born
  18. Our real estate logo as a tattoo of allegiance *

Regards
ABC

 

Not to be outdone, I replied:

Hello ABC
I am working through the list of documents and should have everything consolidated and sent to you shortly. I do not wish to add any delays to the process and am currently on my way to get the tattoo. Are you sure that you don’t want me to sport a Mohawk? I believe the last person I spoke to had mentioned that it is needed for processing refinance loans. Awaiting your response
Regards
XYZ

 

* Anyone who has had to refinance their homes will know that the list of documents required is slightly more extensive than this. If you are in USA on a Visa of some sort, more documents will be required.

** This did not happen to me. It is a slightly modified version of what happened to my friend. Thanks to JG for letting me write his story.

*** If you did not get it, look at the list of documents numbered 16-18.

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